Monday, May 16, 2011

The Door


One day I woke up tired of humanity. I have given my full trust to the world, but in return, I bleed for they have severed it.

I have been good, or at least trying to be. I have never lied (except when I was still a kid). I have never cheated [on someone] (except for asking answers from my seat mate during exams). They say, everybody is a cheater especially in relationships but I will definitely disagree with that for I know that I am not and there are others who are still sincere and true. I always give the benefit of the doubt to anyone, even if they have broken my trust, I still believe that there is inherent goodness in everyone’s heart.  But now I grew tired. I am already exhausted. I am drained. I showered people with my care, with my trust, and with my love, but what do I get in return, pain.

What have I done to deserve such unkind fate? Have I done something wrong in my past lives? Is this karmic in nature? Perhaps it is about time that I should lean on the darker side since trying to be upright and virtuous does not protect you from such pain anyway. Yet, when I decided to be cruel and vindictive, my heart and my soul seem to be torn apart. There is a struggle, an inner conflict so turbulent that I can not bear the suffering. Perhaps, that inherent goodness in all of us is so potent, that my soul can not afford to lose me to the other side.

The other side just increases my torment, my suffering, and my pain.  Mindful of my thoughts and of what my soul is telling me, I stepped back and closed the door to where the ‘devil’ lurks.

Perhaps, the glimpse beyond that door gave me a foretaste of what has to come if I have decided to stay spiteful and heartless. Thus, I have realized that no matter how cruel the world can be, there is no point of turning our backs at them. Let us not add to the world’s misery. We must accept them with open arms even if they have injured your soul. This is unconditional love. Yet, it is easier said than done.

At this point of our soul’s evolution, it seems unattainable to give unconditional love, the love that expects nothing and the love without any attachments. We know that attachments in relationship cause suffering yet it seems impossible to love without any attachments. However, attachments can only be painful if you are not able to let go of it easily. When that time comes that you need to detach yourself, let genuine forgiveness be the key for acceptance will come afterwards. Once acceptance is attained, letting go will never be hard.

Live, love, laugh, and let go.

Namaste.